Poem From EightFold: Numbers and Lists

A. Hannah Spadafora
3 days ago
3 min read

Numbers and Lists

3:07

Numbers and Lists

I find myself

Trying to forget the numbers

Even as the umbrella shelters

Four noble truths

Three marks of existence

Five disassembled aggregates

Three poisons and five fences

Ten perfections and four sublime states

Twelve fetters and equal consequences

And at least five suggested commitments

Under the eight steps we choose to walk—

I find myself

Trying to forget the numbers

As it goes beyond numbers

That suffering is life’s inevitability

Caused by thirst and clinging

But not without relief.

When wisdom is sought,

Observation is reflected on,

Ego is relinquished,

Kindness polishes the spoken word,

Intention transforms thought,

Compassion is brought to all action,

And gratitude is centered

We know and are free.

We know

All is change.

Nothing remains

Exactly the same—

And this is fine.

We know

The world

Is littered with buildings

Filled with bodies—

Both natural and manmade

Conglomerations

No more or less

Than a sum of their parts

Made whole.

We know

That people

Are just aggregates

And personalities

Are just products

Of a thinking organ—

Registering outside sensations

Initiating perceptions,

Turning to conceptions,

Eventually yielding thoughts—

A brain made of blocks of

Makeshift conscious awareness

Forming impressions of a self

Alongside ideas of everything not self.

We know

It is better to let all

Rise and fall—

To remain balanced,

At the center,

Remembering to give,

To well live,

To renounce,

To read and reflect,

To use the energy we have

When it’s there

To wait with patience,

And to speak what’s real.

We know

The folly

That restlessness, worry,

And doubt bring;

The dissatisfaction and irresponsibility

Of sloth and torpor;

And the lost time and harm

Living within ill will,

Or being carried by

The false bliss of not knowing,

The injury of feeling wronged

The energy of lashing out

And the distraction of lust and longing.

And we know

It is better

To love

Even those who aren’t our people

And wish kindness upon

As well as to share the joys of

Even those people who aren’t our favorite

Or who are not easily understood—

That it is beneficial to master our feelings,

Rather than being led by them,

Even when it's challenging

And to reaffirm,

Particularly after weeping or rage,

“I want all beings to be safe, content,

And to see their potential

For enlightenment—“

A mercy we hope

They wish us back

Even if we’re not their favorite people

Or they find us hard to relate to.

We know

We are free

When we forget the numbers

And live the path.

Eightfold: Zen Poetry for Blindly Clasping Beings - Poetry book by A. H. Spadafora, out now

Eightfold: Zen Poetry for Blindly Clasping Beings is a collection of sixty poems that reflect the author’s continual conversation with secular Buddhist thought on human nature, the struggles of existence, and the self-made and human-crafted challenges of modern life. These poems center on a layperson’s striving to find presence in the world, offering contemporary perspectives on Buddhist philosophy, Zen meditation, and traditional stories, koans, and teachings.

Now available as e-book, audiobook, and paperback at zen-chaos.net/zcw-bookstore plus additional formats at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Apple Books, Lulu, and Kobo.

A. H. Spadafora is an author, freelancer, animal lover, and booknerd who lives in the Atlanta area with underused degrees and borrowed cats. She is currently working on multiple manuscripts and juggling gig work while seeking out the right full-time opportunity. Writing has remained the one constant throughout her life—a passion that has shaped her journey alongside the search for survival, purpose, and the chance to do good in the world. Published works include her debut poetry collection, Moments of Peace (2013) and her latest work, Eightfold. She is also the founder of Zen Chaos Writing, offering freelance services, books, and merchandise.